Experigraph

Once upon a time, soul harvesting was simple. You’d grab your scythe, cloak yourself in death and set off to do what hard-working reapers have done for millennia—collect the elusive essence of humanity. It was a reliable system, deeply rooted in tradition. But these days? Well, the art seems to be slipping from our grasp, and we’ve got Dyson to blame. You see, I stumbled upon this revolutionary device: The new, bagless Dyson Soul Harvester. I was drawn to it by its sleek design and futuristic promises. There it stood, whispering seductively, as Dyson products often do, about efficiency and superior suction. Not a speck of soul would escape! And no bags! How did I ever live with bags before? This, I thought, could be my ticket to streamlining the harvest process. Gone are the days of manually gathering souls in cumbersome sacks or antiquated urns. Dyson assures me that the future lies in suction technology, using air multiplier engineering, powered by nothing less than the gaping abys...